The World Spins Madly On...

Maybe I'm writing this for personal satisfaction, maybe I'm writing this because too many people have been asking me why I don't blog anymore. When your life feels like a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle which you can't seem to put together even after countless attempts of trying, typing a simple entry can be quite a complicated chore. Nevertheless, I assure you this is going to be a long one. Long entries are definitely a rarity for me so read it slowly because it might be all you get for the months down the road.

I just woke up after a good night of rest, something which I haven't been able to get the past few months or so. I've got a 2 day MC for a nasty skin infection which explains why I'm sitting in front of my computer on a Monday morning typing this out. I know some of you whom I haven't seen in a very long time have no idea what has been going on in my life, maybe this entry might fill you in a bit. I've got lots of time so I'll try to squeeze in as much text and pictures as possible.

This is a picture of my section mates and I during our Passing Out Parade. As you can see, even though we were bald, green and ugly, our happy faces still shown through because after 9 weeks of suffering, we finally made it through together! I haven't seen these people in a very long time but thankfully memories remain for a lifetime. With hindsight, BMT at Pulau Tekong was one of the best experiences in my life. I miss both the good and the bad, all which definitely made me a much better person. I miss all the great friends I made as well.

I started out in green, but who knew I would end up in blue. On the 25th of June 2007, I traded my uniform of green and became a man in blue, an Officer Cadet in the Singapore Civil Defence Force (SCDF). Apparently, out of the 1800 recruits from BMT, I had been selected to crossover from the SAF to the SCDF to become a Fire Fighting Officer, much to the surprise of myself and the people around me. Out of the 1800 recruits from BMT, only 21 were selected for this special vocation and this made me feel so priviliged to experience something unique, something different from the other officer cadets at OCS. Call me naive at that point of time, I had absolutely no idea what was in stored for me.

This picture was taken during guard duty. I don't have any other pictures of myself in uniform except this one. As you can see, some things don't change, guard duty especially. What can I say, it's all part of the system.

It's been three and a half months since I started my journey in the SCDF and training has been excruciatingly tough. Being a Firefighter is not easy, we are required to go through so many stages of training which literally burn us out completely. Training is short but extremely intensive. When the fire burns, the heat can be so intensive and almost unbearable at times. Being Officer Cadets, we are expected to go through much worst then the Sergeants and the other normal firefighters. We don't really have much of a choice.

The pictures say it all. Almost all of us look like that after the end of training, it just gets so tiring at times. Medics are always on standby so I guess whatever happens we'll be alright. Training is tough but at the end of the day, we always manage to get through it together.

The Firefighter Parade. The people in white are the Senior Officer Cadets during their commissioning parade. As for us, we're the ones in yellow, supporting the seniors in formation. The others behind in black are the Sergeant Cadets taking part as the supporting contingent.

Pictures always speak better than words so I'll stop here for now!

Happy Times. :)
Happier times. :)

Polishing the fire engine. (It's called a pumper btw.)

3 stooges.

It's not easy to clean and polish a fire engine.

The Maze.

Yes Sir!

Gym Training.

No. 2 Uniform. Mind the face. :/

There's so much more I'd like to say but I guess I'll stop here for now. This concludes the end of my long post, hopefully there'll be more to come from me in the future. :)

The Singapore Ferry Terminal is going to be a very safe place tonight...

BECAUSE I'M GUARDING IT!

Yes, that's right, due to some unlucky balloting, I'll be spending my entire night all the way to the next morning vigilantly protecting the civilian commuters at the ferry terminal. So much for passing out yesterday, today is going to be a very long day.

BMT is finally coming to an end, I know it's pretty late to actually start blogging about the whole experience, but somehow blogging before everything even started wasn't quite in my expectations.

What can I say, most people would say that BMT was a horrible experience, but I feel otherwise. Yes, there were times when I felt like shit, leopard crawling through the jungle and sleeping in trenches half-filled with water. Do it again? I'd probably say no, once in a life time is more than enough for me. Yet, the thought of me actually going through the whole thing has given me something to think of, something I can proudly tell my friends that I did, something which I hated but did because I had to. The army makes you do redundant things, but hey, it's all part of the training right?

It is all because of this that I can say that I've fully enjoyed my BMT experience. Doing stupid things in the bunks with my newly found friends can be rather entertaining at times, these are moments which I will always fondly remember. Dancing to Avril Lavignes "Girlfriend", singing to West Life at the top of our voices are some of the things which have kept us going as a section, all the way to the end of BMT. It isn't over yet, there's only more to come. Games day and recruits night is next week, and because Leopard is organising recruits night this year, we are proudly going to declare ourselves Games Day Champions, without a doubt! Scorpion and Ninja, we know you're trying, but Leopard hasn't lost in the last 5 Games day, so I wish you guys all the best, you need it!

Yup, now all of you know I'm still fine and going, life in BMT hasn't brought me down yet. Marching 24km with a full load on is going to be the highlight of next week, it'll finally signal the end of BMT. :(

Other than army life, civilian life for me has been pretty good too. I got accepted into NTU Communication studies just a few days ago, I'm really happy I managed to get through the interview. Just to let you guys know, I wore my No. 4 uniform and carried a muddy field pack for my interview, the interviewers gave me this really wierd look when they first saw me but then again, it just shows you don't have to dress to impress, it's really what you say at the end of the day that matters.
___________________________________________________
Sometimes I've been drifting too much. Somehow I can't stop staring into space and thinking about certain things I thought I've forgotten, I've gotten into trouble a few times because of this. All I know is that if you keep thinking about it, you probably can't forget because the whole memory is still worth something to you. I don't know if that made any sense at all...

2 weeks of block leave when I graduate, I'm thinking of going on a short holiday, somewhere not too far but not too near either. I've only got 2 weeks to enjoy before unit life takes away my freedom, those two weeks are going to be the most worthwhile ever.

I've never missed anyone so much in my life. It's only been in the army when I've started to seriously think about the people who mean so much to me, the people I let down and let go because of the person I was in the past. Everything is different now, but no matter how hard I try, everything still remains the same. If there's one more chance, I'll take it, no matter how difficult things may be.

I just want you to know.

I'll let the pictures say it all.

Sec 1/1, a class I'll never ever forget.


THE BOSS.


Hunks of the Staff room. YEAH RIGHT, haha..


Bimbo's of the staff room, I'm not kidding this time. :D


Staff Room Scandals. HAHAHA


My Valentine.


CWDS Soccer Team 2007 :)

CPA WARRIORS.

MOE training staff!

And last but not least, our beloved Mr. Wong :D

With my new Canon EOS 350D, I can conquer the world. :D

I'm with you.

I can't believe how fast time has passed, in less than a month, I'll be packing my bags and moving on to the army. It seems only like yesterday when I was sitting down in Bishan CC mugging for the long and forgotten "A" levels. Somehow, I miss that feeling very much. Life after 12 years of education can get very mundane at times, I find myself trying to find something to do everyday, something which I guess none of us had to do while we were still studying. I miss my friends, I miss the schools I graduated from and I miss some of my teachers too, the ones who nagged and the ones who made lessons fun and interesting as well, not that I really listened to any of them at all. I guess it's all these subtleties of life which I will miss very much. My advice to all you kids who are still studying, enjoy it while you still can. Cause when it's all over, after a while, you'll just want to experience it all over again.

I'm looking forward to NS life. Right now I feel as if I could conquer the whole world. Throw anything at me and I bet I'll not only get it done but do it 10 times better. Optimism? Nah. Lately I feel that I've grown in confidence, the things I've achieved in the past few months have made me feel so much better about myself. Honestly, I feel like a whole new person.

Right now as I'm typing this, I'm trying to count all the blessings there are in my life. Honestly, to put it in numbers, there are just so many that I can't even finish counting them. I've got a great family who is always behind me, no matter what I've done wrong. I've got great friends, friends who do not judge superficially, but rather befriend based on who you are. My results came out not too long ago, and all I can say is that after 2 months of hard work, I've finally achieved satisfactory results. My place in a university is secured, something which I was still only dreaming of just a few months back. Recently I just applied to become a pilot, and if it's God's will for me to become one, I'll go for it all the way.

What I've learnt is that you can't have everything in life. There are so many things in life that we want but unfortunately, do not need. Right now, I'm more than satisfied with whatever God has given me in life. It is through his blessings that I've become what I am today, whatever I do or achieve, may all honour and glory be unto him.

The Best Is Yet To Be. Everyone always makes fun of the ACS motto, somehow they believe that it means that all ACS boys will never reach their full potential. I know it's meant to be a joke, but after thinking about it for a while, it's true. We ACS boys have no boundaries to our potential, we can only get better and better each day. Can infinity ever be reached? No it can't. We can only try our best to get closer and closer to it each day.

I finally understand why so many people ultimately choose the path of teaching, it's such a fufilling and rewarding career. Being able to mould and shape the life of a student is what every teacher hopes to achieve, personally, I couldn't ask for more. I've seen so many differences in the kids I've tried to help and frankly, that's what I love about the job. I have failed on a number of occasions, but part of being a teacher is recognising the fact that you can't help everyone who needs it, the most you can do is try your best. Even until today, I'm still trying to reach out to a number of students, hopefully before I leave I'll be able to see a change in their lives as well.

Just in case some of you don't know, I work in a neighbourhood school with students who have very troubled backgrounds. I'm not just talking about one student, I'm talking about a significant majority who face problems some of us don't even need to face for our entire lives. Here are some examples.

"Tim" is a very rebellious teenager. He refuses to listen to authority, has no interest in his studies and and is constantly getting into trouble not only with the school, but with the police as well. He's been caught for underage smoking twice (he's only 14 btw) and if he gets caught one more time, he'll be charged in juvenille court and chances are he'll probably be sent to a boy's detention centre. Here's the story. When Boy A was 10 years old, he watched his own mother commit suicide. He's been living with his father ever since, someone whom I've learned has been unable to give him proper guidance, least say play the pivital role of a father.

"Cheryl" is a very adorable girl. She's pretty and popular but when things don't go her way, vulgarities start pouring (some I've never heard before in my entire life) and tantrums start showing, so much to an extent that she simply runs out of class and refuses to go back. Here's her story. When "Cheryl" was 3 years old, her mother abandoned her family. I was shocked when she used the word "abandoned", "abandoned" was not a word I expected to hear from a girl who had just entered secondary school. It's depressing to even imagine what children like "Cheryl" have to go through everyday, thinking about it makes me appreciate my family so much more. Everyone reading this should too, the problems these kids face are so much more than the whiny things we complain about everyday. Just before you start complaining about how life sucks, think again.

I love my job because I love helping people, sometimes I get so caught up in the problems of others that I totally forget about my own. There are so many things I need to settle in my own life but it's hard when you add other people's problems to your own. I guess that's the downside of the job but hey, it's the challenge as well.